For the past seven years I’ve been a mom. That was my main occupation. I was no longer a Medical Transcriptionist, or a Women’s Ministry Leader. My focus was within my home, on my kids and husband. I was a hidden mom, as Emily Wierenga posting at The Better Mom calls it.
“As mothers we have been called to serve our husbands and children. To do those small, unseen things that don’t get a lot of praise or exclamation, that leave us some days weeping into our coffee for the longing to be noticed.” (Except I don’t drink coffee.) – E. Wierenga
I so needed to hear this today. As I blogged a couple of days ago about the opportunity I have to refocus, to actually take time and think about me, my aspirations and dreams I had a really difficult time. For the past seven years my life has been all-consumingly about my boys, my husband, my home.
I have taken my role as mom to be a hidden one…encouraging, nurturing, supporting, correcting, molding, loving my family to their best potential. When you want your child to blossom you don’t want the attention. You want it all for them. You want to hide in the sidelines, rejoicing in their becoming who they were meant to be. That means wiping the runny noses, changing the dirty diapers, steering behaviors, and lots of prayers! Mostly, though that means none of your hard work is noticed. But take heart, God notices!
Read Deuteronomy 6:4-7. To me those verses mean God gave me this responsibility of teaching my boys to fear and love the Lord, to obey His word. As a stay at home mom, this was my job. I’m thinking if God wanted me to do this, spending this time with my boys, playing a hidden role in their lives is something He would notice! I know my role teaching them has not ended, but has changed a bit. And in that changing, has allowed me time to reinvest in me.
It is almost surreal to sit down today and share about how hard it is to switch gears and think about me. I mean, moms aren’t supposed to do that! Think about ourselves, our dreams…psh! Take care of ourselves for our families, sure, but dream?! Ha!
Have you ever felt like you are just working on rote. (Is that the right word?) Just going through the motions and hoping your head will still be above water at the end of the day? That’s the best way to describe how I felt most days in the baby, toddler and preschool years.
Now that school has started again have you had time to sit for a moment and breathe? To think about what you’d like to accomplish for yourself?
You know, there is absolutely no harm in taking time to think. To truly think about yourself – your dreams, what you’d like to be, or what you’d like your role as mom to look like in the future, what you could work on to be that better mom. It’s OK if you feel you’re hiding, still!
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