Have you ever had the opportunity to go back and visit your elementary school? When visiting my hometown last month we checked out the playground at my old school. Its closed down now. The district is shrinking so the school is no longer needed and it looks as sad as the situation is.
I stood at the playground with my brother and husband as the boys played, but wasn’t really engaging with any of them. Memories filled the space I needed to interact with them fully.
The school itself hasn’t changed. But I have. The trees lining the sidewalk into the glass foyer are smaller. I’m just bigger. The windows appear to reflect the outside. As a student they were only a barrier between me and the freedom of a swing.
I see the shell of my old school, beginning to show it’s neglect, and I am keenly aware of how much I cherish the influence my grade-school years had on who I am today.
Being there brought back to mind teachers who had such a great impact on my life. They molded me slowly, gently every day I was in their presence. Even last year I happened to come into contact with one. This was a teacher who I hadn’t particularly liked at the time, but looking back I see how her sternness and discipline is revealed in me. My ‘fear’ of her helped make me who I am today. And I thanked her for who she was and the memory she left in my mind.
I am praying the teachers influencing my boys will have the same impact on them.
I envy the attachment you have with this school and I loved the introspection regarding the way in which those years made you who you became. My growing up involved moving really often, almost always a new school to face, perpetually the new kid. That influenced the way in which I made friendships. I had to learn to be likable and to observe quickly those with whom I might share similarities. But as an adult I had to teach myself to cherish the long term relationships that had been foreign to me. It was so easy for me to just let people go from my life.
Thank you for sharing! I had several classmates move to my school and quickly befriended them because I imagined they must have felt this way. We're always learning more about ourselves, aren't we?